🌟Weekly Inspiration🌟

I attended a Psych Media Consult Group yesterday (essentially a Book Club for therapists) and had some great takeaways that I wanted to pass along as we think about our own anxiety and parenting in the age of anxiety. We were discussing the book UNWINDING ANXIETY: TRAIN YOUR BRAIN TO HEAL YOUR MIND by Dr. Judson Brewer.  

Key concepts:

Fear + Future Planning = Anxiety 
Worry = Me Being Afraid of the Future

The book explains his concept of Worry Habit Loops, which describes how anxiety is negatively reinforced by worry. So first, we experience the uncomfortable feeling of anxiety…our brain wants to make that feeling go away, so we worry. Worry makes us feel more in control and decreases the anxiety a bit—thus it makes the unpleasant emotion of anxiety go away so it negatively reinforces us to continue worrying to ease distress. Make sense? Worry becomes a habit—and you or someone you love likely knows how it feels when worry takes over ❤️.

We discussed hopeful concepts around how to reduce anxiety or let it go altogether:

• It’s a myth that we need anxiety to function well (no research supports this idea)

• People are over-identified with their anxiety (it’s a badge of honor in the modern world)

• The opposite of anxiety is FLOW

• We can stop feeding the anxiety loop by breaking the habit of worry:

  • Show the brain how unrewarding current behavior is (worry)

  • Show the brain how rewarding another behavior is (curiosity or flow)

• Let go of the myth of willpower

This is highly simplified—if interested, I encourage you to read the book!

Ask yourself:
 

Am I anxious? Do I often worry? How might this be affecting myself and my family?
Does worry actually ease my distress? Or just perpetuate the cycle?
When am I in “flow”? How can I create more space to be in flow?
Do I like feeling open and expansive or is that scary for me?
Am I over-identifying with my anxiety?  
Why might my kids be anxious? Are they perfectionists, and worriers, or feel there is no margin for error? How can I support a shift in those patterns?
Wouldn’t it feel good to let go of the idea that we must have anxiety to perform and function well?