Stretching vs. Breaking
🌟Weekly Inspiration🌟
As parents, we should be on the lookout for opportunities for our kids to stretch—move out of their comfort zone, build grit and resilience, witness themselves complete truly challenging tasks, or grow from mistakes made. These opportunities often are accompanied by discomfort, anxiety, and stress. Today’s parents understandably look for ways to soften these growing pains for kids by trying to decrease discomfort, anxiety, and stress—no one likes to see their kid struggle…but I would argue, we all need to get better at this and learn to tolerate—even welcome—when we witness our children’s struggle.
There is a difference between stretching and breaking, however.
“Breaking” a child means the adversity has gone too far or is traumatic. There is a difference—and as parents, we need to discern times when we need to step in to protect our child or help them. If the level of distress is just too much, please come to your child's aid. Just short of that, it would be awesome if you allowed them to stretch.
Ask Yourself:
Growing up, did I stretch? Did it create anxiety, stress, and discomfort? How did I tolerate this?
Did I have challenges so painful they caused me to “break” a bit? How did I recover? How did adults assist me or neglect me? Does this contribute to fear for my child?
Do I believe that life can be orchestrated in a way to minimize pain and suffering for my child? Do I regularly orchestrate?
What would it feel like to welcome adversity?
Breathe ❤️